It has been some time since we connected, 7 or 8 years I’d say. I was a
regular subscriber and poetry/prose contributor over the years I was a
fedz prisoner.
As I’m sure the question looms, “how does one find himself back inside?”
Especially after having done 17 years fedz? Well, while one exited
within a progressive state of mind; obtaining an AA in 15 months; doing
40 hours a week volunteering at a program benefiting those with felony
backgrounds; rebuilding broken ties to my three adult children; getting
into Junior University even!
What I did not get enough of was mental health treatment! All of those
yard riots, overt violence and isolation took a toll it seems! After an
all-out melee while attending a birthday party, i began suffering
flashbacks, nightmares, and chronic insomnia. A professional diagnosed
me with PTSD and recommended medication for sleep and anxiety. I refused
out of ignorance, erroneously thinking it’d tamper with my brain.
Shortly thereafter, an infrequent sexual partner spit on me. My response
was to hit her repeatedly. An act i am ashamed of and totally out of
character. While there were no bodily injuries (serious), i was
convicted at a farce of a trial of multiple charges including burglary
1, assault 2, assault 4 x2, etc.
And given what is called “dangerous offender” enhancement “45 years”!
More time than a murderer. My attorney deliberately aided state in
suppressing my mental health files and permitted my past organizational
ties/prison B.S. to be used as fear inciter. Thankfully, they were in
such a rush to get the so-called “gang leader” they made a multitude of
errors! Any one of which could/should get one a new trial. Picture a
trial where three separate jurors have a connection to the DA or
testifying witnesses. Or a defendant with documented PTSD being
purposely misdiagnosed (via reading past fedz writeups) as having
“personality disorder” so as to justify and legitimize the dangerous
offender enhancement. The struggle continues.
MIM(Prisons) responds: We print this letter because it’s a good
example of what happens to comrades once they hit the streets. Even
those with the best of intentions and solid connections and
infrastructure on the outside can struggle to stay out of trouble after
years of torture and abuse behind bars. This is something we are
interested in hearing more about from released and re-admitted comrades
alike: what can be done to address mental health issues, both before
release and on the streets, to help people stay out of prison?
We understand this comrade’s hesitation in participating with mental
health programs even after eir diagnosis of PTSD. There is a long, long
history of unethical medical experimentation on oppressed peoples, even
those considered U.$. citizens. And the medical and psychology
industries in the United $tates are so closely tied up with capitalist
ventures, it’s difficult to know if you’re getting accurate or truthful
information about treatment or drugs being prescribed.
This anecdote also paints a portrait of how prisons are used for social
control even beyond the prison walls. Violent prison conditions lead to
psychological traumas, there’s no treatment, and then those
psychological traumas carry on post-release and infect interpersynal
relationships, ultimately landing people back in jail.
In general, bourgeois psychological treatment focuses on helping people
adapt to the fucked up conditions of imperialism. If you are depressed
about how unfair and disgusting humyn societies are, that’s a valid and
natural response. Bourgeois psychology would try to put you on
anti-depressants and convince you it’s your problem you’re depressed –
something wrong with your brain. MIM(Prisons) would highlight
that this is a social problem, that your brain is in perfect working
order, and try to rally you to channel that depression and frustration
into working to change these conditions. 9 times out of 10 working on a
political project you really believe in will help relieve psychological
symptoms caused by the alienation of capitalism.
However, in some cases simply acting doesn’t break one out of a mental
health crisis. As much as we try to overcome it on our own, sometimes
addressing the psychological challenge head-on is an important
accompaniment to, or sometimes precursor of, political activism. We’re
not saying to just go along with whatever treatment plan some quack
doctor recommends. But it’s important to smartly tap into these
resources in order to further one’s ability to do political work on an
as-needed basis. For example, if this comrade got treatment for their
PTSD, ey may have been better able to control eir anger, and thus may
have avoided catching another bid.
Eventually we aim to run our own Serve the People medical programs, like
the Black Panther Party was doing in their heyday, combining much-needed
services with political education against imperialism. Until then we
just try to use the few helpful resources available to us to better our
ability to do political work, while we build toward that future.