I’m at the most racist prison in Georgia, Hays State Prison. I am
currently on lockdown in the Tier 2 program (long-term solitary
confinement) and the other day they shook down a prisoner’s room and
found two knives. Being that this is a lockdown the Unit Manager Reids
and the Lieutenant Jones were pissed because we’re not supposed to even
have a way to get a knife, plus sharpening them. And there are 7 or 8
cameras in the dorm, so they can’t hide this like they used to back in
the days when there were no cameras.
They have to report this to the Warden and log it in the log book for
everyone to see. They were so mad at this prisoner that they took it out
on the dorm by keeping the dinner trays outside the dorm for an hour and
a half. Other prisoners in the dorm made a statement to the dorm saying
that we all should refuse these trays and make them go get us new hot
trays instead of those cold ones outside. Everyone agreed and when the
officer came in to pass out the trays (a racist officer) everyone
started screaming “We don’t want those cold trays! Go get more trays.”
When the Lieutenant came in he threatened to give out a DR (disciplinary
report) to any prisoners who refused to take a tray.
The goal is to not take the trays. If one person takes the trays then no
one will get new trays, and we refused our tray by choice. But if no one
takes the trays then they have to go get new trays. They have to feed
us. So things were going good, the first 5 rooms refused, until
Lieutenant got to the 6th one. He took his tray, then two more rooms did
after that. Others were refusing but like I said when one takes a tray
it’s pretty much a failed mission.
My Brother in the room with me and my two other Brothers next door said
they was going to get their trays since a few took theirs. They didn’t
want to go unfed on a weekend where we only get fed two times. I told
them “Hell naw! Just because the others took theirs that don’t mean we
give up an fold! If we got to go hungry and starve just to let the white
man know we as Blacks and as prisoners won’t go for anything then so be
it. We have to sacrifice for the greater purpose.”
True, my stomach was touching my back. But I was ready to starve just to
show the white man he does not rule me mentally. But unfortunately when
the trays got to my two Brothers’ room they took them. Then they were in
front of our door and my roommate grabbed me one and passed it to me. At
first I was going to refuse, well I wanted to, but seeing the tray with
food I gave in.
While we were eating, the Lieutenant came to our door and said “Good
boys. Y’all keep being good.” That made me feel so bad and embarrassed.
I let the white man win another war. He made me feel so low like I’m a
mutt and he told me to sit, I obeyed, and he rewarded me with a bone and
said “good boy.”
I was mad at myself. I should have refused the tray even if it means I’m
the only one refusing. At least I will feel good about myself and what I
did for my self-respect. But I didn’t. Another Black man falls to the
worst side of a white man. Why are we so weak-minded? Why can’t we
Blacks stick together against oppressors? Why do we fall for their
Willie Lynch tactics?
“My Brother is my Brother and I am my Brother’s keeper.” “2 Black minds
are stronger than one, and one strong Black mind is better than none.” I
guess I needed that extra mind to motivate me to go further with the
protest. And when it didn’t I folded, because of feeling alone,
vulnerable and hungry.
That day I told myself that won’t happen again. If I have to starve by
myself then I will. Our ancestors went through much more worse than
this. I won’t fail them again.
MIM(Prisons) responds: This comrade provides us a good example of
self-reflection and learning from our mistakes. Even the best
revolutionaries won’t be perfect all the time, in fact we will make many
mistakes. But the key is always keeping an open mind to learning from
these errors. And also learning from the successes and mistakes of
others. This was essentially what the Great Proletarian Cultural
Revolution was about in China: encouraging people not to blindly accept
what their leaders said and instead to be critical of incorrect actions
and political line, and to learn from mistakes. During this period in
China prisoners were offered an opportunity to learn from their errors,
undertake serious self-criticism, and return to society as productive
members. Although we don’t currently live under a Socialist government
which is encouraging and enabling these progressive practices, we can
still learn and grow, as this comrade bravely demonstrates.